From Gods' own country

Statutory warning : If you are not South Indian it might be pointlessreading further.

Extra Statutory warning : If you are a Mallu with the pride of Kerala inyour loins DON'T read any further.

It has been a well kept secret for eons, shrouded in mystery and mazes ofdeceit, but finally Itty Boben Jacob Elias Kuruvilla from Pazhookaville,near Thelmasherry, Kerala has consented to let us publish this classifiedMallu formula, on the naming of Mallu christian kids.

1. Select a combination of both the mother's and father's names. Eg: Sureshand Sharon = Susha or Joseph and Beena = Jobi.

2. The addition of a 'mon' (meaning son) or 'mol' (meaning daughter) isoptional. eg: Sushamol, Jobimon

3. To attach a modern anglicised feel to the names, the mol or mon can bereplaced with boy or girl. eg: Jobiboy, Sushagirl.

4. For the politically correct Keralite family, mol and mon can be replacedby the universal 'kutty'(child), which can be used for both boys and girls!
Eg: Jokutty, SusikuttyEven parents having combination names can still give their children suitablenames eg: Libi and Jobi = Lijo

However, in the scenario where the parents already have combination namesthat cannot form more comprehensible child names. Eg: Itty and Amukutty,would produce only Itam (which doesn't even sound like a name) or Amit(which is like Northie and stuff!!!!), thena. use an English word like Baby, Merry, Titty, Pearly, Smiley, Anarchy,etc.b. use a combination of two English names that you think sound cool (butnever cool enough) like Meredith + Gina = Megi, or Sharon + Darlene =Sharlenec.

Use a name from the Bible (and not Nebuchadnezzar! Use one that evenvelliammachi can pronounce!) like Jacob, Sam, John, Joseph, Mathew, or Jijo!d. Use a name that sounds like a cuss word but isn't.
Eg: Boben, Prussy,Shagi, JustinTimberlake etc.Note: The use of the letter 'j' is useful in the naming of sibling wherenames that sound alike are a novelty. Eg: Ajji, Sajji, Majji, Bhajji andNimajji, or Sijo, Lijo, Jijo, Anjo, Panjo, Banjo.Q.

What do you call a mallu kid who sticks his nose into other people'sbusiness?
A. Pokemon!!!!!